“How many days left for me?” I asked the nurse. She didn’t answer. She looked sad. “Please don’t talk too much, Miss Thompson, and try to get some sleep. Everything will be OK when you wake up.”
Really? Is that so? I mean, come on. I know myself. Just how many days will be given for a final-staged cancer patient. Is it the real thing or am I just dreaming? I am flying and...and I can see you right in front of my eyes.
“It’s been a while, my love, where have you been?” I think I asked him but I can’t hear my voice. However, he does answers me. “I am sorry honey. It’s hard to sneak out to come see you.” And I didn’t hear his voice. We were looking at each others' eyes and transporting words with some invisible force.
“You look good. How’s everything?” I asked him. He replied, “My life’s never been perfect. It’s lonely, lacks happiness. It’s been a while since the last time I laughed. How about you?” I looked at him and said, “What do you think? I never wanted things to turn out like that. You should know how I feel.”
Then our conversation went dull. I thought the silence will last forever. We looked at each others' eyes, searching for something we had and we both thought we still had. Before we knew it, we held each others' hands and he said to me, “Thank you and do forgive me.” I smiled with a deep heartache, “I always forgave you, you know that. Until the end I will forgive you and long for you… ”
Before I finished my line, I noticed one thing. “Wait, why are you here? You’ve been away from me so long. You left me without a word: it hurt. I was dying, you know? It sucks to live and stand on my feet all alone. It is so dark, the society I live in. I was alone, no, I am alone, you know? Since you left… it’s… it’s pathetic.”
He held me tight and said, “I know. That’s why I am here. Will you go with me?”
“You should have said it long ago. Why after all these years? I am not me anymore. Not the one you knew. My hair is gone. I look like a blood sucking vampire for I am so pale with this pair of panda eyes. I don’t even have the strength to stand still. I lost all my weight. Look at me. I have changed,” I mumbled desperately.
“Shhh. I don’t care and you’ve never changed. You are still the one I loved. And I still love you.” He whispered. "Again, will you go with me?”
I nodded again and again and the tears came out of my eyes. “I thought you would never come back. I was so afraid.”
He looked at me. His eyes were so sad. “I am always coming back to you, silly. No matter where I go and despite the length of time, I am always coming back to you.”
I saw a light. It was bright enough to make me feel light and peaceful. There’s no one but us. I held him back and he kissed me. I felt no pain anymore.
I felt secure and I felt you.
Is this real or am I just dreaming? I am flying.