It can be frustrating when you try and try to secure a date and you still can’t get that certain someone to go out with you. You might be at a dinner party, you might be on Tinder (or Grindr), or you might be at a bar and the ladies just won’t bat their eyelashes at you and provide a phone number. Don’t worry, we know what’s wrong – here are the five reasons that you’re not getting a date.
YOU COME ON TOO STRONG TOO FAST
Don’t get me wrong, men and women like being desired – it’s the greatest compliment after all, but just because a lady/gent enjoy your attention and maybe even thinks that you’re cute, it doesn’t mean that you can just get their phone number. It takes several minutes of small talk and a spark to make a person inclined to provide you with a phone number. Ask for too early and you’ll be swiftly rebuffed.
YOU’RE NOT LEADING AND ENDING THE CONVERSATION
When you’re chatting up your prospective dating candidate you should dictate the conversation and leave the person wanting more. Get chatting, make small talk on a subject that you’re comfortable with, make a joke – if this person laughs and touches your arm; bang! That’s your cue to go but before you excuse yourself to get back to your friends, ever so casually ask him/her for their phone number (or Facebook, Twitter handle, etc., whatever you two feel more comfortable).
YOU’RE BEING A BORE
Either you’re being boorish or boring and it’s resulting in you being rebuffed left, right and center. You probably don’t realize that you’re being course or not coming across as interesting but being a bore is a major turnoff in dating. Try and ask friends where you’re going wrong with your conversation starters and alter your persona around those you don’t know well.
YOU BELIEVE IN LUCK
Guys, dating has nothing to do with luck. Many women are surprisingly responsive to men that have the courage to strike up conversation with them and ask them out – so be polite but be persistent. However, if by the third attempt the lucky gal (or guy) is not interested you may want to give it a rest.
YOU’RE NOT TRYING HARD ENOUGH
Some men expect beautiful women just to fall into their lap – quite literally! Obviously this is a flawed attitude to have and you should be prepared to put in effort (a lot of effort). Dating is an intuitive game and your catch can usually tell if you're not entirely interested in engaging with them. Basically, be a gentleman about your approach but make it well-known that you are here to stay (at least for the time being).